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3 aspects to remember when divorcing as a parent

When you decided that the time had come to file for divorce, you may have had a laundry list of reasons for why it was the best decision. Still, you likely have many concerns and apprehensions about the legal process itself and how you will contend with certain issues that will come up. You may even struggle with your emotions during this time, but allowing emotional reactions to guide your decision making may not work in your favor.

As a parent, you may have even more worries when it comes to how your kids will handle the divorce and what child custody arrangements will work in their best interests. Because their best interests should remain a top priority, you could have to keep your feelings regarding their other parent in check in hopes of ensuring that you come to the best arrangement possible.

Remember parents stay parents

Though the divorce may change your spouse's status from husband or wife to ex-husband or ex-wife, parental status does not change. As you and your soon-to-be ex work through the legal proceedings, you may remember all of the issues that brought you to this point. While those problems may make you feel less inclined to associate with the other person, keeping in mind that your children may not feel the same way could prove beneficial.

Most children want to remain in contact with both parents, and this type of arrangement can often benefit them in the long run. However, some kids may also feel as if they have to take sides during or after the divorce due to pressure from their parents. You may not even realize that this type of pressure exists, but it could come from snide comments made about the other parent in front of the kids or other small actions that can have a big impact.

Remember kids are not parents

Some children may even feel as if they have to step in and take on the role of a parent or an adult in a situation even though they are too young. They may worry that you or the other parent feels lonely or needs help around the house or with younger siblings. Though this may seem helpful, it could also put unnecessary pressure and responsibilities on your children.

Remember your custody options

While working to ensure that your kids do not feel as if they have to do more than they should is important, you may also want to work toward finding the best custody arrangements that could benefit them. Exploring your options may help you and the other parent come to terms that are agreeable for everyone involved.

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